Called My Bluff

The last vestiges of winter, a little failed reverse psychology for a little girl who’s too smart for your own good, and a little must-carry-out-the-silly-threat-to-teach-you-a-lesson parenting ethos lead to more embarrassment than I care to admit.  I really hope you grow up to appreciate the things I had to go through as a dad, Cookie.

Me: Cookie, it’s surprisingly cold today.  Wear your hat.

Cookie: No.

Me: Cookie, I don’t want you to get sick.  Wear your hat.

Cookie: No.

Me: If you don’t wear your hat, I’m going to wear it.

Cookie:  Okay.  You wear it.

Me: If I wear it, you can’t wear it.

Cookie: Okay.

Me:  Don’t tell me you want to wear it later.  I won’t give it to you.

Cookie: Okay.

Me:  Are you sure you won’t get jealous later? [Please don’t make me wear this.]  Last chance.  [Let me keep my dignity.]  It’s your favorite hat.

Cookie:  No, I don’t want my hat, Daddy.

Lesson learned: that’s the last time I make silly threats.

If anyone saw a grown man walking around the city wearing a Hello Kitty hat, holding the hand of an evilly grinning but hatless toddler a couple weeks ago, that was I.  Hello.