*Cookie*: Mommy, I figured out what the “x” means.

*Mommy*: Oh?

*Cookie*: Remember when you said you’d teach me multiplication?

*Mommy*: Yeah, after you’re better with your addition.

*Cookie*: I figured it out.

*Mommy*: Oh really? Are you sure? What’s 2 times 2?

*Cookie*: 4.

*Me*: That’s the same as addition.

*Mommy*: What’s 3 times 2?

*Cookie*: 6.

*Mommy*: What’s 4 times 2?

*Cookie*: 8.

*Mommy*: What’s 5 times 2?

*Cookie*: 10.

*Mommy*: What’s 6 times 2?

*Cookie*: I need to borrow your fingers. No, wait. 12.

*Me*: Mommy, you’re just going up by 2.

*Mommy*: What’s 3 times 3?

*Cookie*: 9.

*Mommy*: Whats 3 times 10?

*Cookie*: 30, and 4 times 10 is 40, and 5 times 10 is 50, and 6 times 10 is 60, and 7 times 10 is 70, and 8 times 10 is 80, and 9 times 10 is 90, and 10 times 10 is one HUNDREDDDDDDD!

*Mommy*: Who taught you? Did you learn this in school?

-Side note: the Pre-k 4 you’re attending is really glorified daycare, where the only things they’re actually teaching are how to raise your hand and how to stand in line: so, no.

*Cookie shaking her head*: I figured it out myself.

Crap. Now what am I supposed to do with you, Cookie?